I'm an eighteen year old Swedish girl. On my blog you're able to follow my thoughts, quotes, photographies; basically my everyday life in the pursuit of reaching goals and dreams.
Sunday
Apparently there is something good about being sick... Eating "risifrutti" in bed, watching the first season of "Sex and the City".
A few pictures from last night at Olivia's, when she announced that she's moving to Malaysia!!
Today Freja and I went to choir practice, we'll sing at a church concert tomorrow. Tonight a couple of my best friends are coming to my place for some dinner and desert + tons of girl talk and just cosyness! Feels quite good with autumn right now, much is happening but in a sort of slow pace... Feels needed. Don't be afraid of just relaxing!
Bought some new stuff with Denise in town today! From Marty, United Colors of Benetton and Lundbergs! Tonight Olivia is throwing a party so I'm getting ready right now. Have a wonderful friday!
I want you to imagine a person that you want to be.
Include characteristics that you consider as impossibilities.
Answer these questions below:
Who do you want to be? In what conditions are you most proud of yourself?
How do you want to act in certain situations?
What perception do you want people to have about you?
How do you want to handle obstacles?
What kind of friend do you want to be?
What is it that makes you like a person?
What role models do you have?
Summarize. What if I told you to be that person? What if I remind you of the fact that life is too short to be somebody you're not proud of and comfortable with? What if I tell you, that if you put your mind to it, it is possible. No matter what you think people will think about you.
What if I tell you, that if you even could imagine that optimal version of yourself, it is as simple as that. Be whoever you want to be. Be that person.
Got stuck in this Twilight-mode... Can't really get enough.
In a state in the middle of being too tired to sleep, too busy to care but too bored to do something important. Instead I'm listening to sweet tones, thinking about all that and nothing but.
It is fascinating how what seems to be nothing special can be so beautiful.
You know what to do. You know what people expect of you and you often know which way that seems right. "This is how it should be done". "This is what you do". In my age you're supposed to have a job, have good grades, have time for fun parties and activities with friends, get your driver's license, plan your future, sleep and so on. As a person in general you should be fun, out going and polite. As a friend, you should be honest and easily available. As a daughter, you should be compromiseable. Suppose is a word that controls our world. There are already set up patterns that we're born in, this is the way it's supposed to be in a particular order. No question marks. This is how the society looks like, adapt.
Everywhere we read about how we should be ourselves. Universities are looking for unique people. What I'm asking myself is... Where are we? Where am I? Am I in the pattern I should be in, or am I the odd puzzel piece? People who stand out, Blondinbella for example, is hated by so many. Many people can't stand that she's not like others. That she dropped school and chose her own entreprenuer path, and thanks to that became a millionare and also has the good fortune to work with something that she is passionate about, apparently irritate people if you look at the comments she recieve on her posts. Is there a way to be in between? Do you have to be dramatically different to succeed and to do something you love for a living (and most likely get criticized), or do you slavely have to follow the pattern that doesn't feel you?
I don't know about you, but critics is something I've considered as negative for a long time. (Critics... Here we have the word "supposed" again.) But what I'm learning is... Critics may hurt but you have to realize that it is nothing but feed back in ugly words. It doesn't necessarily mean what you're doing is wrong (people always see things from their own perspectives and perceptions). Don't let the fear of getting hurt by doing what you love stop you.
You will get criticized. At your first real job, in school, at home, by friends, boy- or girlfriends. No matter what you do, there will always be always people who think you're in the wrong pattern. What people have to learn... Is that we're born and raised in our own patterns and opinions should be aloud to be expressed. Just... Don't let the opinions guide you to something you're not. You see?
Find the right combination of developing in the pattern with people you're surrounded by, just don't forget to bring your soul, your personality. Afterall, the only one who makes the decisions in your life: is you.
Since 2009, we've had –and still have– so much fun. I remember being simply amazed by her stories from the time when she lived in Japan. I was told stories that never in my wildest imagination could come close to be experienced in this little village in Sweden. A life that was completely seperated from the life that I lived, but still, we made such a great team! I don't think I've laughed as much as I did that summer, in the middle of my Tokio Hotel-oriented life, haha! Or been as grateful that she came with me to meet my first crush, haha... I'm so happy to have you as a friend, Olivia♥ She provides me with tons of inspiration, check her blog out here!
I wouldn't say I have a particular clothing style. When I was younger, clothes were a subject that only mom knew of. But as soon as I started to buy my own clothes, colors and "girly" are words that would describe what I bought. At the age of 13, I fell in love with Bill Kaulitz (haha) from Tokio Hotel, and I wanted to dress like him. Black nails, black clothes, black boots, thinking (but luckely not completing) of coloring my hair black, lots of rings, eyeliner, rivets... Constantly listening to rock music and trying to learn German. I still enjoy rock music, just not as enthusiastically. About a year later I started listening to rap music, hip hop... Me and Fanny (my other best friend) dressed us in big, colorful hoodies that we bought on Carlings or from Adidas and finished the outfits with big, matching, colorful earrings, tights and sneakers. Photography, singing and playing the piano was interests that took Bill Kaulitz place, I must say. When I started the gymnasium I instead got inspired by the "preppy" clothing, such as brand shirts, jackets and maybe even skirts, you know the "Harvard look".
And today? Haha, I'd say a mix up of every style mentioned above... Including a pinch of girly lace and pretty, classic but basic tops. I'll tell you when I've found my style!! I've followed Kenzas blog for almost five years now and I really like her style. Another girl that actually comes from beautiful California and shoots beautiful pictures is Rumi Neely. Her style is really unique and even if I wouldn't buy every pair of her shoes (haha) I admire that she stands out from other fashion blogs. Her blog is called Fashiontoast.
I enjoy writing, but when it comes to reading I only have a few favorites. Strongly recommending Isabella Löwengrips book "Egoboost" to every girl in my age. I've heard her lecture, red her blog for a couple of years and red her books and my conclusion is that she is full of sparkling energy and pink girl power! Read!
One blog that I recently started following is Louises. There's not many people I get inspired by in this small Swedish town, but her posts I can really relate to and get inspired by! Seems like she always has things to write about and I bet she'd be an amazing writer. One of those real people, you know.
Just came home from Freja's, met a lot of nice people. In the end, only Freja, Olivia and Gustav were left and I snug into the sleeping bag in the hammock. I even fell asleep for a little while, next to the cosy sound of their voices and a table full of litten candles. I'm now ready for bed. ♥
The fog is thick and you can clearly tell autumn is taking place. The leaves are starting to change color to my favorite nature colors, dark red, orange and a bit yellow. I don't know. Maybe this is a start of something new. Maybe dad's forcing me to change rooms isn't as terrible as I thought. I'm just lack of energy. I've always been afraid to fail, and when I can tell things in school or with friends/family for example are going bad, I just loose it all. Maybe it's true, what they tell me. Don't cover yourself in things you can't handle. But the difference is, I know I can handle it. That's why I put the standards high from the beginning, even if I know I'll have a hard time solving it. And maybe I won't succeed, but then at least I'll be happy I tried. I just... I don't know.
I'll just look through my window, watch the autumn leaves slowly fall to the ground, get mixed up with other color leaves. Falling into their place. Maybe I'll se them as my problems. The yellow ones are for school, red ones for friends and family, orange for future. And for every problem that's solved, they fall off the branch. But they're not bad. They get mixed up with eachother, and together create this beautiful ground for me to stand on. A solid ground full with experience and wisdom, to remind me that "I did this". Later, new green leaves will grow on my tree. You can see them as new things to solve (as a never ending to do-list) or as opportunities in learning something about life, which later on contribute to an even thicker ground. The procedure of life. You just have to choose your way of looking at it.
Oh, what a deep post. Will post something more fun later on, it is friday after all ♥
I don't think you actually know how you're doing, until you open up yourself to real people, who you truly can feel care about you. It's important those things, talking. To dare to open up to the right people. I mean, you're surrounded by six billion people in this world, you're not supposed to walk alone. Just find the right people worth walking beside.
I think, that the ability of taking contact with new people and the ability to connect with the right people, contributes to your goal in finding yourself. It's hard, I know. You've probably heard of those people, who "steal" your energy. Don't misunderstand me, a relation with another person is all about giving and taking different types of energies and helping eachother to a better life. But a relation with a person who takes more energy than she gives, is not a relation worth having in the end. I bet you all know what types of relations I'm talking about.
So tonight I've had an insight, my eyes are now suddenly more open. What I've learned, I'll share with you when I've tried it in real life and when I'm ready. Until then, my advice to you is not to be afraid to share your feelings with people you can trust and take advice. You don't always know what's best for you, stress easily turn you to the wrong directions. It may seem easy, shuffing the hard thoughts back in your head and continuing (but with a few stones lying on your shoulders). But after a while, it doesn't last. The stones get heavier. In life, I've already been, and going, through a lot and lately my head is starting to ache everyday, especially after school. I confess I'm afraid of not being good enough, or doing the right things. But after tonight, a small stone fell of my shoulders. I feel that I have people in my life who truly care and believe in me. A few. But a few is all that is needed. And it's not until you start growing together with those true people, that you actually start living. For real.
