Alexandra

The fog is thick and you can clearly tell autumn is taking place. The leaves are starting to change color to my favorite nature colors, dark red, orange and a bit yellow. I don't know. Maybe this is a start of something new. Maybe dad's forcing me to change rooms isn't as terrible as I thought. I'm just lack of energy. I've always been afraid to fail, and when I can tell things in school or with friends/family for example are going bad, I just loose it all. Maybe it's true, what they tell me. Don't cover yourself in things you can't handle. But the difference is, I know I can handle it. That's why I put the standards high from the beginning, even if I know I'll have a hard time solving it. And maybe I won't succeed, but then at least I'll be happy I tried. I just... I don't know. 

 

I'll just look through my window, watch the autumn leaves slowly fall to the ground, get mixed up with other color leaves. Falling into their place. Maybe I'll se them as my problems. The yellow ones are for school, red ones for friends and family, orange for future. And for every problem that's solved, they fall off the branch. But they're not bad. They get mixed up with eachother, and together create this beautiful ground for me to stand on. A solid ground full with experience and wisdom, to remind me that "I did this". Later, new green leaves will grow on my tree. You can see them as new things to solve (as a never ending to do-list) or as opportunities in learning something about life, which later on contribute to an even thicker ground. The procedure of life. You just have to choose your way of looking at it.

 

Oh, what a deep post. Will post something more fun later on, it is friday after all  ♥